Walking by faith, not by sight of my or others' lives

I woke up discouraged at another week on the job search. I have had to break through on God's goodness and really trusting that it is real and thus acting on that belief. For most of this day, that was a challenge because I was on the money chase (mentally) as I went on the job hunt. God helped me perservere through my time at the call center and that helped. I kept on switching between asking Him for help and being miffed at Him. Finally when I was walking home, He asked me if finding out that Matt Chandler had Stage III cancer had anything to do with my attitude. Jen & Eddie Smith had put a link on that on Twitter. Yup. Actually, that it did, and I went to bed right after I read it, so I didn't really get to process it.

So, I wrestled God with it: Ok, God, what did Chandler do wrong? Nothing. I do not treat My elect as their sins deserve. Ok. Well, why is there a chance that he will be taken away from his family & church? Why would you play someone like that to give them all this and then take it away? What is more important to Me? What will last forever? Matt's body or Matt's soul? Um.... soul. God showed me that this trial was refining Chandler's faith and also now he can sympathize with people in his congregation that are dealing with illnesses in a way that he couldn't previously. That's making him a better shepherd of his flock. Not that he wouldn't be a good resource for someone previous to this. But somehow, God has decided he is more effective for the Gospel in walking through this sickness, and if he lives or dies depends on how much glory God will get. I realized that though this is causing Matt's family a lot of discomfort and himself a lot of discomfort, one day he will be in heaven due to this or something else and won't be worried about it anymore. He will be with God.

Therefore, is God good? yes. Even when a young pastor and father of 3 gets a rather aggressive form of cancer? Yes. Matt Chandler was on MSNBC telling literally millions of viewers that God is still good and soveriegn. Dude, that's outreach for REAL. Everyone can look at his church before than and say, "That's Matt Chandler's church and God is good because he has this." Now he is saying, "Matt Chandler has cancer. But I can look at God for who He is and walk in it through the pain. God is good."

Ok, how does this apply to my own life? Because God is good not because Katie has even 2 part-time jobs. But because of His character, because He does not treat me as my sins deserve, because He sent Christ to die for me, because He cares for my co-workers to send little me to work through so He can reach them. Even though I can stress about work or lack of a full-time job with benefits in my field, I can worship God and say He is good because I rest on who He is, not merely what He has or hasn't done.