Thursday, June 09, 2011

What if it was more than a love tap?

The most random incidents get you thinking about life, I realized today...


So, I was "love-tapped" by a truck as I was walking to Rite-Aid. Yes. Big truck, little me. Luckily, a) the truck was in the driveway and was just going along and b) I was walking b/c pedestrians had the right away and the driver was looking the other way before pulling out & didn't realize I was still partially in front of her vehicle until she heard the squeak of terror from me. She bumped my left side and it hurt for like a few seconds, but I was ok :) I waved to her to let her know that I was ok. 


Anyway, I'm sure it's happened to a bunch of people before, but I did think: Wow, what would've happened if she was barreling out of the driveway and instead of giving me a love-tap, she made a Katie-pancake? 



Well, first of all, I would've beat Dr. Grandin to heaven (assuming she comes to know Christ at some point)  which is sort of weird to think about because she's old. 
Second of all, I am glad that I have an app in my phone that lets me put in my emergency contact information. 
Third of all, it would be sort of ironic for my doctors since I was just at an appointment.... 


I think what naturally happens after a true brush with death or a 'wow, that could've been a brush with death if the circumstances were different' is we don't take life for granted. Even the small things like being able to dig into a bowl of yummy cookies and cream ice-cream after coming home from a warm walk :) 


As I ate my ice-cream, I thought about it further: How would my life be summed up today? I am a 27 year old Human Development and Family Studies grad who has worked at a group home and a call-center, is a pre-k coordinator at Summitview, a part of Team Ninja in Symbio, and a resident in The Quad. I also have a nerdy-crush on a certain CSU professor and I enjoy flowers, stuffed animals, and cute things. At some point, I want to get a PhD in something and I'm about ready to start some occupational therapy (OT) prerequisites. 


This is the sum of my life so far. From a mere earthly perspective, I'm an average - ok, physically shorter than average person who's trying to get her career going and is a Christian who's involved in her church. If one digs deeper, they realize I'm a person on the spectrum who's trying to go somewhere using another exponentially more well known spectrumite's life as a guide. 


If I was turned into a Katie-pancake today, what would remain of my life? Well, my thesis got published, so I would have made it into the PsychInfo database as first author!! :D I also am third author on my advisor and her post-doc's publication. There would be this blog that would be here on the interwebs and there would be pictures of me that my friends have and that I have on this computer. At Summitview, there would be several groups of little people that would remember me as one of their Sunday school or AWANA teachers. I think that last contribution would be something I'd look down and smile about because of my HDFS interventionist side. The fact that I got to influence the next generation as a single person is nice :) 


What would be my eternal impact? To put it more accurately, what would I look back at my life and say, "God, thank You for using me here on earth." ? Probably the first thing I would thank Him for would be His using me to teach little people about Himself :) And the second thing would be Him using me to love people with significant disabilities at the group home. And the third thing would be "Thank You for using me to reaching my family, the CSU campus, and the Fort Collins community in the little ways You've used me." 


The weird thing to think about now is that even if I ended today going splat, my life would have some sort of eternal impact. 


The cool thing and convicting thing is that I didn't end my life as a Katie-pancake today. I have more days. God, I thank You that though my current professional status isn't much, and I'm a pretty average person and definitely not normal, You still use little me for eternity. God, help me live in light of what counts and help me not to take life for granted. Help me live for You because honestly, I really don't know how long You have me here. Thanks for not making a Katie pancake out of me today!!!!!!! :D 

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