Divorce is SCARY!

I'm working on my handout for Intro to Law where a group of us are doing an overview presentation on Family Law. Since many clients of family lawyers deal with divorce, we are focusing on the divorce process. 

DIVORCE IS SCARY!!!!! 

I just want to say that right here right now!!! 

Um..... Katie, you're not even married yet. 

Yes, I know but I'm reminded of how I can get really scared when I think about marriage!!!!!!!! 

Of course, it would be nice to be married, but there's the possibility of it ending prematurely. What if hubby dies on me or what if he cheats on me, or what if he up and leaves me? That would fall in the realm of NOT COOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Divorce is also scary because there's a whole mess of issues to deal with such as visitation, allocation of parental responsibility (custody), division of assets, division of property and then usually the woman (with joint or full custody) has to re-enter the workforce or somehow find a way to be promoted if she is working full time because now she's the sole earner of the household with children. Sure, she has child support and/or alimony, but still. 

Now that is why I want to hold onto my job and am reluctant to just up and quit if I have kids. Because of my fear of the 'what if I can't get employed again and I really really need to??' That's also why I wouldn't mind being single. I wouldn't have to worry about the 'what if he dies or leaves me and I'm all alone and what do I do now??' 

That's not to say there are NO what-ifs in the single world. There are. What if I get laid off, what if my roommate walks out on our lease, what if the bus wraps itself around a tree and nearly crushes little me - who will take care of me then? 

But I think the greater fear is that I don't want to entrust myself to someone else only to get hurt. I can argue that dividing up assets and custody would be no fun and that's why divorce scares me, but the above reason is the real reason why it scares me. A lot of it comes from being raised to never really trust men, but some of it comes from knowing both Christian and non-Christian couples that have divorced, so I know it can happen to anyone. 

Here's the question though: if I entrust myself FIRSTLY to God, then, He's the main that that has my back. Even if I get married, He's the main one I can trust with assets, property, children, etc. So if hubby croaks  or otherwise leaves, yes it would be difficult - very difficult, but if my trust is in God, I can be afflicted but not crushed, preplexed, but not driven to despair, struck down but not destroyed, because my hope and joy is in the life of Christ (2 cor 4). 

In this, though I don't like reading about divorce, that fear doesn't have to paralyze me