Just a reminder to all that this blog STILL EXISTS!!!!!!!!!! I get really busy and don't write as much as I can, but....
Isn't it that way with God? We check back regularly with Him. but we really don't talk to Him in depth. We say we're too busy. yet our flesh and worries pile up, and we know there's the Fountain, but we just don't go. May He remind us to come to Him with confidence due to His grace.
Sunday, December 31, 2006
Saturday, December 09, 2006
Accurate Cures
Today on the radio, there was this commercial for a neuro-peptide supplement. It seemed correct: Take this protein normally found in your brain to help your brain function better. However, peptides degrade in your stomach (hence why we can eat steak - mmm.... steak...) and therefore, the protein would only serve as a source of amino acids the body could utilize. The cure sounded like a good idea, but it was flawed at the level of ingestion rendering it possibly ineffective.
Before we in the medical community prescribe or recommend anything to patients, we must know what they do, and how they interact with the body. To do this, we must know the fundamentals of how the body works, chemistry, etc. etc. Basically, we must draw from the basics learned in pre-med and medical classes. If we don't have that foundation, we can't assess these new cures.
That is the way we should interpret other doctrines, religions, or philosophies. We must have a firm grounding in the basics of Christian doctrine and of God's Word. We may find a philosophy that on the surface seems compatable, but when it is examined against the fundamentals of Christianity, those basics may reveal a fundamental flaw in the philosophy in question. But how often do we examine other philosophies? Do we understand how to 'dissect' and evaluate new ideas against Scripture? More importantly, do I know enough scripture to analyze the ideas around me so I don't treat myself or another believer or an unbeliebver with an inacurate cure?
Just as physicians can make medication errors because they may miss a fundamental flaw with the medication - for example drug-drug interactions, not considering how the side effect will affect the patient, etc. we as Christians can give advice or follow philosphies we miss fundamental flaws that may alter the way we think of God or His word, or we may find that the philosophy clashes with Christiaity. That forces us to choose one side or another.
Just like every disease has one 'true' treatment regimen that works, God thorugh His Son has sent Himself to redeem and cure all Creation and those that follow Him. Just like there are a million different medication errors and false treatments in medicine, there are many false gods and doctrines apart from God. And just like a good physician has to discern between the right cures and not make errors, the Great Physician can perfectly understand what we need and has provided it in His right time.
Before we in the medical community prescribe or recommend anything to patients, we must know what they do, and how they interact with the body. To do this, we must know the fundamentals of how the body works, chemistry, etc. etc. Basically, we must draw from the basics learned in pre-med and medical classes. If we don't have that foundation, we can't assess these new cures.
That is the way we should interpret other doctrines, religions, or philosophies. We must have a firm grounding in the basics of Christian doctrine and of God's Word. We may find a philosophy that on the surface seems compatable, but when it is examined against the fundamentals of Christianity, those basics may reveal a fundamental flaw in the philosophy in question. But how often do we examine other philosophies? Do we understand how to 'dissect' and evaluate new ideas against Scripture? More importantly, do I know enough scripture to analyze the ideas around me so I don't treat myself or another believer or an unbeliebver with an inacurate cure?
Just as physicians can make medication errors because they may miss a fundamental flaw with the medication - for example drug-drug interactions, not considering how the side effect will affect the patient, etc. we as Christians can give advice or follow philosphies we miss fundamental flaws that may alter the way we think of God or His word, or we may find that the philosophy clashes with Christiaity. That forces us to choose one side or another.
Just like every disease has one 'true' treatment regimen that works, God thorugh His Son has sent Himself to redeem and cure all Creation and those that follow Him. Just like there are a million different medication errors and false treatments in medicine, there are many false gods and doctrines apart from God. And just like a good physician has to discern between the right cures and not make errors, the Great Physician can perfectly understand what we need and has provided it in His right time.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
God in a Shattered Mind
I transport patients with a variety of mental statuses. Some are near asleep, some are in a presistant vegitative state, some are groggy, some are grouchy, some are elateed because after the exam I take them to, they get to go home.
I transported a woman who really wasn't all there. She could talk, but her thoughts were extremely tangential, and she often kept asking me where we were going. I would explain to her again what procedure we were going to. We passed the hospital chapel, and her eyes lit up. She sat up straighter in the wheelchair and said, "You know, God doesn't want religion. He just wants people to love Him and His Law." The rest of the way going to the exam, we talked about who God was, she listed off the 10 commandments, and we talked about how much we loved God.
Through this, I saw past this woman's shattered state of cognition into her spirit that God had probably pruned (Jn 15:6) and sanctified over a lifetime. For a Christian, the body does deteriorate, but what remains is the soul wrapped in the glory of God. The grey matter of one's brain looses mass, the neurochemicals may be at a lower concentration, the neural pathways may start to become more disconnected, but the love for God was not present in this woman's mind. It was present in her soul, for she had accepted Him as her Savior, and in keeping His commands and remaining in His love, it was Him that sanctified her - and it was evident that He was her reality when she could make sense out of nothing else.
I look forward to the day where we may meet again in the new Creation, with whole bodies, but more importantly, in that unity with Christ that, by her love that reached beyond the capacity of her mind, she gave me a mere glimpse of.
Oh, God, may I love You so much more, that even when my cognitive abilities fade, my heart for You remains. I can't imagine the type of faith, love, and obediance this woman had toward You. May she be an example of what I hope to be - broken yet completely Yours.
I transported a woman who really wasn't all there. She could talk, but her thoughts were extremely tangential, and she often kept asking me where we were going. I would explain to her again what procedure we were going to. We passed the hospital chapel, and her eyes lit up. She sat up straighter in the wheelchair and said, "You know, God doesn't want religion. He just wants people to love Him and His Law." The rest of the way going to the exam, we talked about who God was, she listed off the 10 commandments, and we talked about how much we loved God.
Through this, I saw past this woman's shattered state of cognition into her spirit that God had probably pruned (Jn 15:6) and sanctified over a lifetime. For a Christian, the body does deteriorate, but what remains is the soul wrapped in the glory of God. The grey matter of one's brain looses mass, the neurochemicals may be at a lower concentration, the neural pathways may start to become more disconnected, but the love for God was not present in this woman's mind. It was present in her soul, for she had accepted Him as her Savior, and in keeping His commands and remaining in His love, it was Him that sanctified her - and it was evident that He was her reality when she could make sense out of nothing else.
I look forward to the day where we may meet again in the new Creation, with whole bodies, but more importantly, in that unity with Christ that, by her love that reached beyond the capacity of her mind, she gave me a mere glimpse of.
Oh, God, may I love You so much more, that even when my cognitive abilities fade, my heart for You remains. I can't imagine the type of faith, love, and obediance this woman had toward You. May she be an example of what I hope to be - broken yet completely Yours.
Monday, November 06, 2006
The beauty of staph
Admittedly I thought it was weird: A scrub top print as "Pewter Staph." I am NOT making this up. Go to Smart Scrubs and brows under the clearance items, and ye shall find (and ye shall laugh if you like nerdy pre-med humor!) Yeah. Most definitely weird. Then I thought: Why would anyone make a scrub top design out of an organism that is a pathogen - lethal in some cases?
Bottom line, there is something aesethetic about those bacterial colonies branching out in all different directions. Just as there is something aesthetic about the human body - at the macro and microscopic level. There is beauty even among the most medically vruelent things. Such as the HIV virus: Google a picture of it, and you stare in wonder.
What does this say about God? Does even the deadliest bacteria and virus declare His glory - yes, even His beauty? If so, then something made it change from a beautifully complex entity to a beautifully complex deadly organism. Christians know that 'something' was sin. Was the Fall of Creation.
How much more beautiful will these bacteria and viruses be - assuming they are present in the New Creation? How much more will they reflect the glory of the One who made them if now, they are only a poor reflection of what He originally created them to be?
And that is how we are as well. Broken sinful people, aesthetically beautiful anatomically as Body Worlds II has shown us and still reflecting the fruits of the Spirit though inadaquately? Once washed by Jesus' blood and once comitted to walking in His way, in the New Creation, we will no longer be a reflection of the image of our Creator. We will be with Him and He will be fully reflected through Creation - incluuding us.
Bottom line, there is something aesethetic about those bacterial colonies branching out in all different directions. Just as there is something aesthetic about the human body - at the macro and microscopic level. There is beauty even among the most medically vruelent things. Such as the HIV virus: Google a picture of it, and you stare in wonder.
What does this say about God? Does even the deadliest bacteria and virus declare His glory - yes, even His beauty? If so, then something made it change from a beautifully complex entity to a beautifully complex deadly organism. Christians know that 'something' was sin. Was the Fall of Creation.
How much more beautiful will these bacteria and viruses be - assuming they are present in the New Creation? How much more will they reflect the glory of the One who made them if now, they are only a poor reflection of what He originally created them to be?
And that is how we are as well. Broken sinful people, aesthetically beautiful anatomically as Body Worlds II has shown us and still reflecting the fruits of the Spirit though inadaquately? Once washed by Jesus' blood and once comitted to walking in His way, in the New Creation, we will no longer be a reflection of the image of our Creator. We will be with Him and He will be fully reflected through Creation - incluuding us.
Friday, October 20, 2006
Medicine's Water
There is a such thing as Transporter's High. I discovered it unwittingly when we were seriously really busy and I must've done ten transports back-to-back which is actually rare considering there are six of us on day shift. Transporter's High is equivalent to runner's high. The biological mechanism is probably the same: the excercise and the adrenaline rush plus the need to block muscle pain causes the release of endorphins. I got the feeling I could work for two straight shifts. Of course, this feeling didn't last the whole shift, just for maybe like 20 minutes or so.
It also gave me an understanding as to why many doctors and medical students and probably anyone in the medical profession can get sucked into this world of medicine and forget what's 'outside.' Working in a hospital feeds a person. For me, it gives me a reason to get up in the morning. Aside from te paycheck, I get to see patients that have been there a while, help them get better by taking them to procedures, and also, I can be there for a patient when he or she just needs to talk about how their stay at the hospital is going. There are bad days and bad moments too, but the good stuff keeps me going. Hospitals have their own life, their own structure, their own language. Once I began to work inside the one I'm in, I could feel it start to become a part of me and I a part of it. I could get poetic and say something like: The blood that's in it's people is in me and the pains they feel are the pains I feel and the oxygen that's being given to them is the air I breathe - but I'm not that far gone - yet hahahaha!
But what does the hospital give me besides patient interaction and a community? What does it give all medical professionals, but especially doctors and medical students? A higher purpose. Status. Something to watch over, and yes, even someone watching over them (Hospital administrators, regulators, HMO's, etc.) In the hospital, a doctor has nearly the whole staff at her feet: people to run the tests she orders, other doctors to do her sugery she requests, nurses to care for her patients, and even pipsqueak transporters like me that take said patients to their exams and procedures.
A few days ago, I was reading John 4 where Jesus talks about Himself being living water. The medical environment can be the 'water' that sustains people - ok, me if I go to medical school and so on and so forth (God willing), or God Himself can. If I let the medical environment consume me, then I would be satisfied. At least for a while. But if the healthcare system gets so unfunctional, it's more of a hassle for all of us, and if patients aren't improving like I would want them to, then it would be consuming but also draining. If I loose a patient, it would be even harder to deal with. Medicine can let people down. Medicine has let me down before. Therefore,
medicine can't be that life that consumes me. This does not mean that I can't be a doctor. But I have to be something greater. My life has to take on more meaning
beyond the hospital doors.
Enter the Creator of the universe, the Great Physician. Jesus Christ. If it is His Blood that sustains me, His living water that runs through me and fills me primarily, medicine can be an even more joy since I will walk in His steps and emulate His ways - of course all with His help!!! He can fill the gaps that medicine leaves open: The patient that gets worse, He can comfort, the patient that dies He may receive. He is the patience I need to deal with complaining co-workers and patients, snappy nurses, and later on, the patience and humility I must continue to have if He allows me to be a doctor. He is the comfort I need when I am pretty sure a patient I have transported a few times has died, and the comfort I'll need in the future should I have to actually pronounce a patient dead. He is the One whom I give thanks to when I see a patient improve, and the One whom I'll give credit to when a patient may later thank me for helping him or her recover. If medicine is the life physicians and other members of the medical community draw from to sustain themselves, Jesus Christ is that true Water they truly seek.
It also gave me an understanding as to why many doctors and medical students and probably anyone in the medical profession can get sucked into this world of medicine and forget what's 'outside.' Working in a hospital feeds a person. For me, it gives me a reason to get up in the morning. Aside from te paycheck, I get to see patients that have been there a while, help them get better by taking them to procedures, and also, I can be there for a patient when he or she just needs to talk about how their stay at the hospital is going. There are bad days and bad moments too, but the good stuff keeps me going. Hospitals have their own life, their own structure, their own language. Once I began to work inside the one I'm in, I could feel it start to become a part of me and I a part of it. I could get poetic and say something like: The blood that's in it's people is in me and the pains they feel are the pains I feel and the oxygen that's being given to them is the air I breathe - but I'm not that far gone - yet hahahaha!
But what does the hospital give me besides patient interaction and a community? What does it give all medical professionals, but especially doctors and medical students? A higher purpose. Status. Something to watch over, and yes, even someone watching over them (Hospital administrators, regulators, HMO's, etc.) In the hospital, a doctor has nearly the whole staff at her feet: people to run the tests she orders, other doctors to do her sugery she requests, nurses to care for her patients, and even pipsqueak transporters like me that take said patients to their exams and procedures.
A few days ago, I was reading John 4 where Jesus talks about Himself being living water. The medical environment can be the 'water' that sustains people - ok, me if I go to medical school and so on and so forth (God willing), or God Himself can. If I let the medical environment consume me, then I would be satisfied. At least for a while. But if the healthcare system gets so unfunctional, it's more of a hassle for all of us, and if patients aren't improving like I would want them to, then it would be consuming but also draining. If I loose a patient, it would be even harder to deal with. Medicine can let people down. Medicine has let me down before. Therefore,
medicine can't be that life that consumes me. This does not mean that I can't be a doctor. But I have to be something greater. My life has to take on more meaning
beyond the hospital doors.
Enter the Creator of the universe, the Great Physician. Jesus Christ. If it is His Blood that sustains me, His living water that runs through me and fills me primarily, medicine can be an even more joy since I will walk in His steps and emulate His ways - of course all with His help!!! He can fill the gaps that medicine leaves open: The patient that gets worse, He can comfort, the patient that dies He may receive. He is the patience I need to deal with complaining co-workers and patients, snappy nurses, and later on, the patience and humility I must continue to have if He allows me to be a doctor. He is the comfort I need when I am pretty sure a patient I have transported a few times has died, and the comfort I'll need in the future should I have to actually pronounce a patient dead. He is the One whom I give thanks to when I see a patient improve, and the One whom I'll give credit to when a patient may later thank me for helping him or her recover. If medicine is the life physicians and other members of the medical community draw from to sustain themselves, Jesus Christ is that true Water they truly seek.
Monday, September 25, 2006
Secondaries
Ok, update on the pre-med life: I filled out one secondary for Medical College of Wisconsin (brr.... cold winters AAH!) and I SHOULD submit the one to the place in St. Louis, and I'm nearly done with the Creighton Essay and the CU essays. I should submit everything later this week....
I'm moving closer to my dream of going to medical school, but I need to remember to draw closer to God. I've been reading a sister in Christ's bloggings about falling in love with God. Do I desire that as much as this dream? Do I thumb through the Bible soaking up His word and His presence just as much as when I flip through theJournal of the American Medical Association and soak up those articles and dream about where I want to be in 8 years ( KT MD!) I have to say that my quiet times have become routine, but I don't have that awe all the time that I would like to have, and honestly, I don't devote as much brain-space to God's word as I do those secondary essays. My spiritual life is suffering. Right now, the equilibrium side of me is heavily favoring the KT's amitions, flesh, etc. etc. side rather than the KT's submission to God, her Creator, Savior, Father, Lord's plan.
I know the cure is leaning more toward Him. I know the cure is reading His word. I know the cure is pursuing my secondaries, but only in the midst of pursuing Him more.
Prayers for this would be appreciated :)
I'm moving closer to my dream of going to medical school, but I need to remember to draw closer to God. I've been reading a sister in Christ's bloggings about falling in love with God. Do I desire that as much as this dream? Do I thumb through the Bible soaking up His word and His presence just as much as when I flip through theJournal of the American Medical Association and soak up those articles and dream about where I want to be in 8 years ( KT MD!) I have to say that my quiet times have become routine, but I don't have that awe all the time that I would like to have, and honestly, I don't devote as much brain-space to God's word as I do those secondary essays. My spiritual life is suffering. Right now, the equilibrium side of me is heavily favoring the KT's amitions, flesh, etc. etc. side rather than the KT's submission to God, her Creator, Savior, Father, Lord's plan.
I know the cure is leaning more toward Him. I know the cure is reading His word. I know the cure is pursuing my secondaries, but only in the midst of pursuing Him more.
Prayers for this would be appreciated :)
Monday, September 04, 2006
A day in the life...
Ok, so I have been at this Transportation Tech job for 1 month. That explains the absence from the Blogger. As does the filling out the AAMCAS. As does the looking for grad schools if the med school thing doesn't work.
So, what's been going on in the life of this blogger? We - ell, yeah. I'll just describe it in the day of my life as of now.
5:45 am. I get up to the sound of my alarm on my cell-phone going off. Time to get up and change into the scrubs de jour, pack a lunch, and pick up a container of yogurt for breakfast.
6:10 - 7:00 Waiting for the bus, I have my quiet time. I have a pocket Bible, so I've been reading stuff in the New Testament, Psalms and Proverbs after reading the Days of Praise devotional de jour. Then I watch the sun come up and thank God for it because it's pretty. Sometimes if someone else is at the bus stop, I chill out with them because they're generally really cool. I get on a sequence of bus - Light Rail - another bus. In between stops, I grub on my yogurt. Mmm.... yogurt.
7:05ish I skid into the Transportation office at Denver Health. Most of my co-workers are already there, and I chill with them and we clock in, and the manger talks to us (who by the way is Christian and formerly pre-med which is way cool). Then the day begins.
7:10 - 12 or 1 ish Morning. I move patients, equipment (sometimes) and other things around the hospital. We're kept pretty busy. We get the requests down in the office, and we, the techs get paged. "Get this person in this room to this procedure and he/she can travel by bed/wheelchair." So yeah. Go in, introduce yourself, get yo gloves on and yeah. The patients are in varying states. Some are chatty, some are groggy, some are grumpy, ya get the point. I ask God to help them especially if they're currently in pain / worried about the procedure etc. etc. I also take blood samples to the lab. They're in bags. Some labs need to go to the lab as in now, so they're labled as Stat. I try and pray for the patients in need of the stat labs specially if they're pediatric patients or from the Mom / Baby unit. Sometimes I recognize the name on the test tube and pray for that person.
12 ish - 1 ish A half hour within that time bracket. Hospital grubbin' time! Yeah, the cafeteria gets crowded!!! I'm like, "Dang it's crowded!" (in my mind). Anyway, I used to use this time in less productive ways, but now as I grub, I write my thoughts about how this is helping me with training to be a doctor, write about interesting cases and what questions I have to look up in Medscape later. And if a case(es) was(were) on my mind from the morning, I try and pray about them.
Afternon until 3:30 More of the same as the morning.
3:30 - 4 ish Bus ride home on a sequence of busses and the Light Rail. I just chill. I have a coworker who rides one bus with me, so we get to chat about the day. It's a nice de-briefing especially if I had a lot of questions about a patient or a 'what could I have done better' thing. I spend some time on the bus praying for the people at the hospital and just relaxing.
home I change out of my scrubs de jour into bum around the house wear. That is, after I give Mom an "I'm home!!" kiss (if she's home). Then I chill out and then I fix dinner if Mom wants me to.
So, what's been going on in the life of this blogger? We - ell, yeah. I'll just describe it in the day of my life as of now.
5:45 am. I get up to the sound of my alarm on my cell-phone going off. Time to get up and change into the scrubs de jour, pack a lunch, and pick up a container of yogurt for breakfast.
6:10 - 7:00 Waiting for the bus, I have my quiet time. I have a pocket Bible, so I've been reading stuff in the New Testament, Psalms and Proverbs after reading the Days of Praise devotional de jour. Then I watch the sun come up and thank God for it because it's pretty. Sometimes if someone else is at the bus stop, I chill out with them because they're generally really cool. I get on a sequence of bus - Light Rail - another bus. In between stops, I grub on my yogurt. Mmm.... yogurt.
7:05ish I skid into the Transportation office at Denver Health. Most of my co-workers are already there, and I chill with them and we clock in, and the manger talks to us (who by the way is Christian and formerly pre-med which is way cool). Then the day begins.
7:10 - 12 or 1 ish Morning. I move patients, equipment (sometimes) and other things around the hospital. We're kept pretty busy. We get the requests down in the office, and we, the techs get paged. "Get this person in this room to this procedure and he/she can travel by bed/wheelchair." So yeah. Go in, introduce yourself, get yo gloves on and yeah. The patients are in varying states. Some are chatty, some are groggy, some are grumpy, ya get the point. I ask God to help them especially if they're currently in pain / worried about the procedure etc. etc. I also take blood samples to the lab. They're in bags. Some labs need to go to the lab as in now, so they're labled as Stat. I try and pray for the patients in need of the stat labs specially if they're pediatric patients or from the Mom / Baby unit. Sometimes I recognize the name on the test tube and pray for that person.
12 ish - 1 ish A half hour within that time bracket. Hospital grubbin' time! Yeah, the cafeteria gets crowded!!! I'm like, "Dang it's crowded!" (in my mind). Anyway, I used to use this time in less productive ways, but now as I grub, I write my thoughts about how this is helping me with training to be a doctor, write about interesting cases and what questions I have to look up in Medscape later. And if a case(es) was(were) on my mind from the morning, I try and pray about them.
Afternon until 3:30 More of the same as the morning.
3:30 - 4 ish Bus ride home on a sequence of busses and the Light Rail. I just chill. I have a coworker who rides one bus with me, so we get to chat about the day. It's a nice de-briefing especially if I had a lot of questions about a patient or a 'what could I have done better' thing. I spend some time on the bus praying for the people at the hospital and just relaxing.
home I change out of my scrubs de jour into bum around the house wear. That is, after I give Mom an "I'm home!!" kiss (if she's home). Then I chill out and then I fix dinner if Mom wants me to.
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