When a Desire Resurfaces

I'm in the house of Summitview nerdlings (children of parents who are both enginerds) watching them for an evening.  We ended the evening of Lego robot demonstrations and Star Wars Wii with a Bible study.  I won't lie,  it felt weird teaching a passage to kids outside of a classroom setting and in a different age group than what I'm used to. 


But when I was done,  I felt an odd feeling: the desire to be a Christian parent.  Yup.  You read right!! The spectrumite who until recently assumed she would neeeeeever marry because a certain famous spectrumite never did is rethinking all that.

Here are my feelings on all this:

Why do I want to get married all of a sudden?  Because what if God really DOES have an earthly man who gets me enough to want to tie the knot?  It would make me happy.  The adjustment would take getting used to, but I would be less scared knowing said guy would be there to help too!  Plus nerdlings are so cute!!!!  God, if I with copious COPIOUS amounts of Your help raise a future scientist, doctor,  or professor who wants to reach academia for Jesus, that would be SOOOOOO COOOOOOL!  And even if I pop out super-nerdlings (spectrumites) I'd understand them and they'd understand me and that would be cool!!!! 
I still want a career and I'm not ready to rely fully on a guy to support myself + progeny.  I like the idea of me relying on myself (somewhat since God ultimately provides) putting money in the bank.  I also like the single life: roommate dinners, eating ice cream for dinner and leftovers for breakfast (sometimes). But I am opening up again to see that I still think it would be cool to raise the next generation of. Christians. Not as the ultimate HDFS badge of "you made it!!!!!!" But if that is how God wants to show His power through limited people :):)