Sometimes when it comes to relationships, I feel like Captain Oblivious.
Haha, like Dark Helmet from Spaceballs! He's pretty oblivious sometimes :D |
Granted, this was one of those rare moments where the guy just up and proposes without dating beforehand. So that was harder to spot, but still. WOW!
I wondered why that bothered me so much and then I realized why. One train of logic could be as follows:
If I get good at predicting when other people will match up, I can thus predict when I will get matched up and predict if a guy likes me. If I predict that a guy likes me, I can thus have hope that someday he will be my prince charming and I will be a beloved princess.
Kira Knightley as Miss Bennett |
Elizabeth Elliot |
In The Rock I followed Elizabeth Elliot's (and my older sisters in Christ who mentored me) advice. Outwardly. I became better at not outwardly flirting with guys. Of course me having autism spectrum disorder that made it hard to read social cues didn't help me see when I was flirting even though I was trying to be stealth.... Anyway, I got better at that and blending into the group.
However, I would think, "THIS GUY right THERE is possibly THE ONE!" and then get bummed when he wasn't. That happened a few times. Quite a few times.
Now I'm learning to follow Elizabeth Elliot's advice inwardly. To focus on paralegal school (right now) and the working world and whatever else God has me in right now. I decided not to play the Elizabeth Bennett game where I think, "Is HE the one? What about THAT ONE over there? What about...." Because I realize that for Prince Charming to be the one, God would probably make it pretty darn obvious a) so my heart won't be pulled off astray by my own faulty guesss work and b) because the way my mind works, stuff like that just needs to be obvious.
I am thankful God is teaching me these lessons and that when it boils down to it, I am HIS princess and HIS beloved, so I don't have to really clamor for an earthly prince charming to love me. The King of Kings does, so truly, all my fairy tale dreams ARE true in Him :) :)
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