Conquering my Husband’s Sock Drawer

My sweet husband spent ten minutes – ok – it seemed like ten minutes when we had breakfast to eat and a light-rail train to catch – ten minutes looking for his matching sock. His drawer is full of varying shades of black socks. Yes, some have different textures, so there could be mismatched socks, but 10 minutes looking for socks. And his wife had a pair ready to go in her little hands 30 seconds into the search.

I could've nagged – uh – longer – but, I realized my husband wanted to be the "man who conquered" and so I let him alone to conquer his sock problem.

Of course when I got home and he was at his internship, the first thing I did after dishes and laundry was tackle that sock drawer!

Yeesh! I've been married for almost two months and here I am blogging about chores. I giggle to myself thinking, "That's what my stay at home wife/mom" friends blog about.

That got me thinking even more:

Ever since I got married, I have this drive to clean the former man-cave… ahem, Hubby and my house, and I get excited about cooking for my man, hanging his clothes up, and yes even going through and pairing up his socks.

Bri-Bri cooks and I do the dishes, but I also find myself doing more of the chores. This division of labor is largely due to Bri-Bri's internship taking place this fall. He is away from home 2-3 evenings a week and on Saturday mornings.

I knew I'd accept this arrangement because it needed to happen for practical reasons. My brain surprised me by thinking about household tasks or ideasd during downtimes at work, and I felt the same pride finishing chores as I did finishing work tasks. And I want to work just as hard helping my sweet husband around home like I do at work.

 

Where did this come from?

 

Well, even though my mom went to college during the feminist movement and my aunt was quite involved in that, my mom still asked me if I was ready to be a wife. "Are you ready to clean for Brian and cook?" I rolled my eyes and laughed.

"Yes, mom, but remember, it's the 21^st century. The spouses usually share the work now." I grew up watching one of my aunts share home and work duties with her husband, and my cousins enjoyed having both parents involved in their lives while having active careers. Growing up in a single-parent home, I knew having a child and having a career was possible, and took for granted that would be my life as an adult.

In college, my role models in marriage because my 'Summitview moms' and 'Summitview older sisters' who showed me what life was like when a woman chose to make a career out of being a wife, homeschool teacher, and mother. Now that I think of it, I did have a blog post examining the position of a wife and mother as a career path.

During my time at Summitview, I came to respect that role as much as I respected a paying career path. Some of my friends at Summitview thought the pastors encouraged that role for mothers and didn't address two-earner households as much. Because of that, I began thinking quitting my job after having children was the right and Godlier thing to do.

Now that I am in the working world, I have examples of women who work hard in their careers and also are good parents to their children. I see examples of this in my current church, and I know some women who also stay at home with their children or have stayed at home with them when the children were young.

In addition to all these role-models, I have my natural instincts informing my feelings and actions. God binds a husband and wife together physically, so from that, I have a drive to be close to my husband and that probably motivates me to help him and make his life easier :) There is also that ever-present reward center of the brain that gets activated when my man tells me I did a great job with the dishes or for attempting his laundry or even sorting his socks. That reward system is further reinforced by a sweet kiss :)

This is the classic nature versus nurture debate. Do I want to be a "full blown" homemaking wife and mom because I saw examples of it for so long or because it's somehow wired into me? Is it a mixture of both? I can think about it and tease it apart to satisfy my nerdy mojo and that's perfectly fine. More importantly though, I need to ask God what should I do? How does He want me to fill those roles practically and how do support my husband in a spiritual way? The ultimate answer can't just come from what I see around me or the biology within me. It has to come from my Creator God who designed marriage and who united my husband and me for His purposes.

Choir Small Group!!!!!!!!

What? Tso blog posts in onenight? Well, I couldn't post actually on Saturday (technical difficulties), but I can hopefully post this second entry without any ssues:

I'm part of choir at Southeast Christin church!!!!!! Sharon is in choir with me along with my Bri-Bri!!!!!! We all get to worship God in song and study His Word evry week! I asked the choir director if I could be in Sharon's group and she will let me know!!! Squeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

I There we both are with our choir name tags!!! Squeeeee!

Go Girl Time!!!

Saturday Sept. 20:

I'm waiting for Sharon, a friend from church / choir at Park Meadows food court. We are having giiiiiirl tiiiiime!!!!! It feels like old times when Imhad girl time with another friend at Summitview :) I'm so happy to have girl time because it's familiar and how I grew spiritually at Summitview :)

Each friendship will be new and different and I am looking forward to Sharon and my friendship not just being a mentor role friendship but two ladies doing life together :) I want to learn from her and I pray she is encouraged by me as well :)

Yay! She's here! Let the talking and giggling begin!!!

Legally A New Me!!!!!

Friday:

I am eating a yummy sandwich at a Brugger's by the Arapahoe County DMV. I tried going to another DV, but they didn't issue Colorado ID's. A walk and light rail ride later, I ended up at another DMV and yet another document shall be issued with my...MARRIED NAME!!! SQUEEEEEEEEK!!!!

Yup! A new me :)

Do I feel different? Well mmmaybe. I have to get used to introducing myself with my married last name. As more and more documents have my new name, I get used to the new me :)

Sunday:

A larger question is how is my identity forming as a wife? Do I only compare myself to other friends when they were newlyweds or do I ask God how He wants me to help my new husband? More importantly! I must realize that my identity is still in Christ. That hasn't changed and that identity rather my identity as Boaz's wife should be my foundation.

It's really happening!!!!

I'm waiting for my sweet Bri at Dry Creek station so we can go to the Arpahoe County Clerk and Recorder to get our... MARRIAGE LICENSE!!!!!!!!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I'm excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I also got a box for my cards and found cuuuuuuute paper for it!!!!! I also worked om my flowers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm excited for the wedding day event, but I feel a deeper excitement to marry my sweet Brian Boaz and begin life as his wife and helpmate!  Planning for the wedding event has beem stressful with Mom's worries and that has caused me to not have the excitement I wish I had. But spending time with my sweet dork and his son made me realize I was joining their family. I would suport my Bri-Bri in raising his son. He would be there to love me and I would be there to love him :) He will be my huggable strong man and I will be his helpmate.

God is writing our story :) We always come back to that. I have seen His hand in the wedding planning: Him giving me patience to help me talk to Mom when she worries, getting flowers I wanted on sale, ditto for the cake :) and other little good surprises.

It's really happening!!!!! The wedding day is coming together and Gd continues to prepare my Briam Boaz and I to join our lives as one! 

Wedding Planning: Refocus or Stress?

Ok, my last blog post was about wedding planning and my mom freaking out about some things. Well, she is still freaking out about the catering because she decided to pay for catering our reception as a wedding gift. Which is nice, but there is definitely more planning involved than all three of us (mom, Boaz, and I) had intended. So we're working with it.

Like I also said in my earlier blog post, I can look more at the 'stuff to do' than at the larger picture because that's how my mom reacts and I can very easily get into that same mindset.

My aunt reminded me that I need to have a good perspective and have fun. So, I did.

My sweet goofball let me take fun pictures of him with gigantic flowers at Hobby Lobby :) That was a fun moment! I also met the photographer who is a friend of his at his (soon to be our) church. Us ladies giggled about flowers and about silly and cute photos we could take after the ceremony. 

More importantly, my sweet fiance and I find ourselves talking about our future, planning our future, daydreaming about life as Dorks Unite. That's the real fun. There is security in knowing that whatever happens on our wedding day, we will be married at the end, and that's what matters. 

A moment to relax

The pool at my apartment!

Greetings Blogshere! These last two months have been a whirlwind of wedding planning. Yes, Boaz and I are getting married August 16! A bit earlier than April 2015 when we originally thought. 

I'm excited to get hitched soon, but my (and my mom's) worries.... Ok, mostly my mom's worries threaten to take the joy away from this time. Boaz and I were planning on a simple ceremony and reception. As my mom has offered to pay for certain elements and requested a more formal celebration, I find myself dealing with more details. Sometimes that can get overwhelming, especially when she is calling me daily worrying about things that need to get done. Biaz has been a big help too with helping with the details and being the shoulder to cry on when I can't calm myself and Mom down. He holds me and remind me that God's got this and He is at the center of this wedding and marriage. 

Constantly, God reminds me that I prayed earnestly for the days where I would prepare myself to be an earthly bride. Now I must trust Him in the details.

One sweet reminder was seeing this rainbow when Boaz took me to pick up my dress. 

God  reminded me once again of His faithfulness and some eeks mixed with tears happened! 

And no, Boaz did not see my dress when he took me to pick it up :)

Here's why:

 

He is Risen!

Chris is risen! Happy Easter!!!

Today Mom and I went to Hope Crossing and she enjoyed the service :) More importantly,  she and I discussed Christ's resurrection and what it meant for Him to overcome death, sin, and evil. We were both reminded of the reality and Truth of the Gospel.

Today as we discussed church, I was struck by the contrast between now and about 10 years ago. (10 years ago? I feel old... aw :/....). I was in The Rock at CSU and I was a new Christian praying fervently that my mom would see my involvement in the youth group as a phase but as a change brought kn by me knowing Christ as my savior.  Many times during thr first couple of years as a Christian, I spent a lot of time explaining my faith to my mom. My friends were used to me literally crying in prayer for God to be real to my mom.

Today as we walked out of church discussing the service,  I smiled because on the day Christ defeated sin and death, He answered one of my deepest longest prayers.  When then pastor proclaimed , "Christ is Risen!" Both my mom and I responded in faith,

"He is risen indeed!"

I Could've been Mina

In the movie "God's Not Dead" The character that I thought about the most was Mina.  We find out that she is a Christian in a relationship with a non Christian.  She is either living with him or spends a lot of time at his house.  At one point, she brings up their differences in worldviews causing an argument. This leads her to confide in a pastor. During the course of the conversation, Mina realizes she was using this relationship to fill a void in her life.

I was the same way. I could've gone after someone who I admired. If he was not already taken, I could've thought he would've met my needs even though we had differing worldviews.  Like Mina, I could have imagined dating a strong atheist even though I was Christian.

I coukd have run to this person instead of God, and like Mina,  I would have realized that this person couldn't truly understand me due to our differing worldviews. I was close to going down that same road before God showed me how he fill me.   Mina's story haunts me because it could have been my own.

God's Not Dead: My Review

I joined two friends of mine from Hope Crossing to see the movie "God's Not Dead" where a prelaw college freshman takes up his philosophy professor's challenge to prove God and disprove atheism. Another friend posted this link from Creation Ministries International which critiques the movie based on how well a literal interpretation of Genesis was utilized. Their review also evaluted how realistically other characters who represented different groups in the cultural debates are often portrayed. 

I agreed with the CMI article, and I am still glad I saw the movie. 

To set some background, I am Summitview trained in apologetics and in college, I learned various ways to logically explain my faith and common questions often presented to Christians from others of varying worldviews. Apologetics can be taught in an us versus them fashion, especially if the media and other facets of society tend to demean Christianity. I definitely felt that academia was not on the Christians' side, so I resonated with the kid going up against his professor. 

Also setting some background, I know what it was like to be a person seeking answers. Though I didn't take an anti-God stance, I was looking for someone to explain things like the problem of evil and assurance of salvation in a logical way. Before I became Christian, I had mocked Christians and I thought that praying for an illness to go away was foolish because we had medicine for that. In short, I have been on both sides. 

Now, to address CMI's arguments: 

1. Josh's arguments were insufficient to convince a critically thinking audience such as a true college professor and a philosophy class. He did not follow a literal interpretation of Genesis. Though he quoted much of the narrative, he allowed for evolution to be true. He also tied evil to free will rather than to sin. 

I agree with these criticisms. I think if he had to argue more than the basic first cause argument, the movie would've ended up being more of a giant lecture with plot thrown in. That would be fine for Bible nerds like my Summitview friends and myself (given the right mood), but maybe not for a broader audience. I also think this movie was meant to give Christians a starting point to begin arguing their faith and they would be free to do their research. However, again, if a Christian isn't in an apologetics heavy church like Summitview or a good church where scripture is examined deeply, than just using these arguments against a better trained debator would be quite a challenge. The article addresses this and emphasized that students who watch this shouldn't feel like they can rely soley on Josh's arguments against their own professors. For non-Christians, this movie can give them partial answers, but again, they would need to do more research. From my own experience, I often revisited the same questions as a seeker and needed to dig deeper. Luckily, I had Christian friends who understood my need for understand and explained things rather than friends who saw my questions as attacks on their faith. 

2. Other characters and even other Christians in the film were portrayed inaccurately and in a unhelpful stereotypical way. Amy, a journalist critical of Christians is hostile with her interviewing technique where most journalists would at least be civil when interviewing a subject. Journalists usually save their arguing and spats with fellow newsanchors on CNN or FOX. She only softens up when she is desperate for answers to her own life situation.

Ayisha is a Muslim student, but the directors did not get her traditional outfit right. They also portray her family in a way that would cause non-Muslims to be critical of that people group. CMI said that this would be detrimental for Christians reaching Muslims for the Gospel. I agree. Though they show how hard life can be for a Muslim individual who openly switches faiths, they neglected to stress that not everyone's situation is like hers. 

Professor Radisson is your hard-line atheist and his home is probably not typical of a Humanities / Liberal Arts professor's home. Those guys don't make that much. Anyway, he is almost too aggressive with Josh, and if he was at CSU, Josh could bring his behavior in and outside the classroom toward him to the Dean of the College of Liberal Arts and the Office of Conflict and Dispute Resolution. 

Finally, on the non-Christians' side, an unnamed business man is the stereotypical profit-driven cold CEO. All the ladies in the movie theater want to kick him in the balls for the way he treats his girlfriend in her time of need, but again, one can make a stretch that a successful business professional will have a cold money-hungry attitude without Jesus. That is not true. There are many corporate officers who may not be believers, but are kind to their staff and use company funds to donate to charity etc. 

On the Christians' side, Pastor Dave and his missionary friend interact with nearly everyone in the movie. Pastor Dave appears to be a young pastor who is burnt out and wishes he could be "in the trenches" like his missionary friend who works in a foreign country. The missionary encourages Pastor Dave in his faith and is constantly amazed at the conveinences in America. The CMI article criticizes their portrayal as Christians who have shallow faith. Again, I agree with this, and yet I see how they serve to bring the story together rather than detract from the central plotline of Josh's debate with his professor. 

What I would say to other Christians who want to see the movie: 

This is a movie to inspire you to share your faith and to make you remember that even people we would label as 'enemies of our faith' because they outwardly are hostile to Christians may also have very real struggles. If you want to begin defending your faith like Josh, read your Bible, read good apologetics books, and always have faith that God will supply you the answers and remind your heart to have compassion for those asking you these questions. 

What I would say to non-Christians who want to see the movie:

No, not every Christian sees you as a 'Professor Raddison', especially if you are in academia. People such as C.S. Lewis and Lee Strobel have written books about Christianity that present you questions in a very logical format. Many scientists and professors are Christian, though they may not be outspoken due to the climate in academia. You can have your faith and your intellect. Use this movie as a starting point to find answers. 

No movie will be a perfect witness because each Christian is not a perfect witness. We are imperfect. We sin. We backslide. Sometimes quite badly. But Jesus is the perfect example of God coming to earth to redeem mankind. Jesus conquered sin, death, and hell. In Christ and in all that He is, He is the perfect answer.  I believe the producers' hearts were to point people to Christ. After seeing this movie, I will pray for everyone who sees it that they find Christ alive and our Redeemer.

God's Three-Pronged Closing Argument

I "randomly" flipped to Job 40 for my quiet time. God answers Job after Job has questioned Him as well as sought advice from others regarding his suffering. God lays it down with 3 arguments.

1. He Is. He is the only God. "I Am." He has brought down kings and He alone can save. He is the ultimate law-giver and determines justice. He is worshiped in Heaven.

He could've just said, "I'm God. You're not. The end." However, he uses examples of various creatures that Job had either heard about or seen in the wild whose attributes point back to him. Romans 1:20 states that God's attributes can be see in His creation, He was using additional pieces of evidence to make a solid case even more watertight.

2.  He is strong. The behemoth is apparently the most powerful animal on the planet. Its tail is the size of a tree trunk and has enormous legs and a skeleton stronger than the strongest metals at the time. Yet God is stronger than this creature.

3. He is untamable.  God uses the example of the Leviathan which was a water dwelling creature that would be impossible to catch due to its ability to fight with a fishing crew. It would be like the guys on "The Deadliest Catch" trying to catch a shark in the middle of a feeding frenzy. God emphasizes His strength again by mentioning the Leviathan's strong outer coat of hard plates.

Job obviously repents.

Of course, I had to ask myself, so what to make of this exchange? The plaintiff has lodged his complaint against the defendant who responded with a watertight argument in His favor. Is God just up there saying, "I'm powerful, you're not, and I do what I want, and poor humans mwahahahaaa!" No. Because within the argument of "I am," He implies that Job's right hand cannot save him, but God's right hand can save Job. Taking the 'case' as a whole, we see that God and the devil are in a spat and the devil raises an argument: Job only worships You because You give him good things.  God allows Satan to pull away everything Job has dear: his children, his wealth, and his health. Satan was watching as all this was going on. He would be the jury that decides the facts while God affirmed His law.

Job worshipped God ultimately because He is, He is powerful, He is untamable, and He is good. The verdict Satan had to concede was this: God Is. He is real and that is why He is worshiped.

The Five Minute Blog Post

I'm on my lunch break now and decided to post something.

After six months at my law firm, I have yet to complain about my job. Sure some parts can be challenging and I just remembered a billing issue I should work on upon my return. 

However , I always enjoy coming to work. I enjoy the tasks, my co-workers are great, and the pay is nice :) The deeper reason behind my lack of major complaints is a mix of contentment and finding my niche. Knowing this is where God has placed me allows me to approach each day with a smile. Knowing I am working in my strengths helps me feel confident in my work even if an issue comes up. I am grateful for my job because I know what it's like to work in a place that's hard or in an area where I struggle. I am grateful for my job because I remember the toil of the job search process. I am grateful because all this comes from God. 

That could've been me

Nothing like the past coming up in the oddest of ways.

My law firm handles estate planning (writing wills and trusts) as well as probate and trust administration (handling legal and financial issues of individuals who have passed away). My job touches both areas of law as well.

Today I had to send some documents along with a death certificate to a county clerk and recorder office. As I read over the death certificate to make sure everything matched with the other documents, I saw that the individual died from a gunshot wound. At home.

The individual may have inflicted the deadly wound upon himself. Of course, I don't know the situation for sure. He could've been doing some maintenance on a hunting rifle and something happened. But I got chills thinking about it for too long.

Because I could've ended it all even before I began this blog. Even before I graduated from college.

He left behind a family. A house. Sure, the family will be financially stable still with the house and his earnings, but he will never make a trip to Home Depot to get new curtain rods or an odd or end to fix something there. He will never see his kids graduate from high school. He will never tell his wife he loves her before they go to work. If he was out of a job, he would never get a call from possibly a position perfectly suited for his qualifications.

I felt sad that he might have given up. Because I know how that feels. Hence I was compelled to write the previous post for anyone that feels like giving up.

Because I wish I could've told that person named on the certificate that the feeling of wanting to give up on life is real and scary, and searching for hope in the midst of that is worth it. Because you realize what you would have left behind. And you know that there's a reason to live.

An open letter to hold to hope - no matter how small

  

To you who can't see the light in your dark: 

Don't leave. Please. Don't leave. 

For your family: who would always ask why. Because they will miss you. You're not a burden. Even if they're supporting you due to a lost job. Even if they left you due to a divorce. Someone still loves you - an aunt, a cousin, a niece or nephew. Even if they left this earth. Others will fill the pain you feel of missing them. 

For your friends: Even if you think they're too busy to talk to you - they are still thinking about you, praying about you, wishing you well. They want you to call and ask for help. They will do what they can - even if they're busy with life. 

For your future: You don't know what the next second will bring. Maybe your roommate will knock on the door to hang out. Maybe your children will knock on the basement door to play with you. The next morning might bring a beautiful sunrise. The next day might bring a job offer. 

For your Creator: He made your heart - an intricate pump that hasn't stopped beating from the time it was formed in utero. Who gives you grace to live each day with whatever disability you face. Who has felt physical pain and abandonment when He died on the Cross. For all of us. 

I almost gave up. Many times. I almost didn't graduate from high school. I almost didn't go to college. I almost didn't get my degree. I almost didn't live long enough to have a boyfriend that would propose to me. 

I felt pain. I felt tired of my disability. I felt tired of being a burden. I felt alone. I felt like no one would care if I was gone. I felt like if I ended it all, I would be free. 

That moment of utter helplessness and aloneness would've stolen countless sunrises, hikes in the mountains, hugs from friends, chances for me to help others, a chance to see God comfort me here on this earth. I know I will feel pain again. We all will. 

But we also can see hope - we must see hope. Even for a second, if you cling to hope for one second, you can hold on for another. Then a minute. Then for the rest of the night. Then your hope can be renewed as the sun comes up, as you see others who know you: friends, family, the barista at the Starbucks you go to, the same driver on the bus. 

You are wanted. By your Creator. He can give you hope. Don't be afraid to ask. He understands pain. Don't be afraid to cry. Call your friends or text. They will talk to you or think of you until they can connect with you again. 

Don't leave. Because when you find hope, you can one day extend it to those caught in the darkness. 

1/4 tsp red pepper today makes the sniffles go away

Ye olde blogger has a stuffy little nose! Hopefully it's just the cold weather, but boiling 1/4 teaspoon of red pepper and hot water makes the tissues disappear and my little nose feel less stuffed. 

Random, I know. But living on my own, it's nice to see how to come up with my own solutions for things - oftentimes with the help of Pinterest and the Internet in general. 

Yay for random blog posts! 

I have a legal assistant job, now what?

I like my legal assistant job :)  Over the last few months, my boss has thrown some bookkeeping duties in the mix and added a few more $$ to my pacheck :) 

Even so, Mom is bugging me to only stay with these guys for a year or so and then go on to another opportunity that pays more. 

Thanks mom. But I have had my share of job search adventures :P 

But that made me ask the question: 

What's next? 

I always throw around the idea of writing a book. 

Hm.

I also throw around the idea of freelancing. Actually, I was very briefly a volunteer grant writing freelanceer volunteering my time with two organizations just helping them with research and stuff. The idea of freelancing came after I was diagnosed with Asperger's and I thought, "Hey, that's how Temple Grandin started..." 

But yeah. 

Will I stress out about it? No :) Because it's easier to just dabble in these ideas when I have consistent $$$. 

More importantly, I need to keep asking God what He would want me to do as I go on in life. He orchestrated all my adventures in life so far..... :) Some were definitely challenging, and some are really nice rides :) Anyway, we'll just have to see :) 

Cracks in the Dream Castle

As a little girl, I enjoyed reading books about princess and stuff. I never had a princess castle cake, but the idea of finding a prince charming and living happily ever after was appealing to me. 

Oh my gosh.... cute little Asian girl and cute cake!!! 

I think the longing was stronger for me because I wanted a father-figure and just want to feel the love of a man who would be my rescuer and my - well, my everything. 

Well, my prince charming came and proposed and I said yes :) 

Recently, I have been seeing the cracks in the 'dream castle.' I know all relationships are not perfect, but I think when I worry if my prince charming has forgotten about me, I feel forgotten and that hurt may be stronger for me because I had attachment problems when I came over from the Philippines. I failed the attachment assessment when I had my comprehensive developmental evaluation at 18 months old. 

Realizing my insecurities can affect how I think about my relationship is jarring to my feelings but makes perfect sense to my HDFS mind. Well, yeah. I read about how one's development can affect marriage and relationships. It's just different to actually feel it. To have my emotions crying while my HDFS text part of my brain shows me where my crying is coming from. 

So what? What do I do to repair the cracks in the prince and princess castle of my dreams? Well, I think continued therapy is always good and I will need to discuss with my prince charming. The most important thing I should do is to always go to Christ and let His truth that He is enough and He has overcome the world sink in. In this life, I will never have a perfect princess castle with my prince charming Boaz. But in the next life, we all will have a perfect world with Christ as our King! I pray to God to help me keep that as my true hope. 

2013 Year in Review May - December

May 

I continued my internship with Metro Volunteer Lawyers. That was pretty cool because I became more comfortable with working with clients. May was also the month where I began my Estate Planning and Probate class: my last elective of my paralegal program. I sat next to a girl who worked at an estate planning law firm near Cherry Creek. We became friends and we would giggle together during class breaks and stuff. 

May was also the month my Boaz had his little guy full time for the summer. We began a routine where they would meet me at Park Meadows or Lincoln Station. The three of us would eat at the food court or at Boaz's house. While my sweet Boaz was cooking, I talked to little guy and we bonded over stuff like his superhero figures he carried around and the video games he liked to play. He was particularly good at a Spderman game. 

June - July

After my Probate and Estates class ended, I began looking for a paralegal job in earnest. I was looking before, but now I had some time between that last class and the upcoming fall class to really hit the ground running. 

I knew God would provide for me, but I began to feel the same worries of, "What if it turns out like the job search in 2009 where I can't find a job in my field of study?" Mom was supportive, but she was also worried about me. Her worry made me worry, but I couldn't show it. Luckily I could tell Boaz when we were in the car and his little guy was playing a game or watching a DVD in the back seat in his own world. The reassurances he gave me, the reminders that he was praying, his warm heart, and warm massive hands that wiped away my tears really helped me continue to trust God and persevere. 

In late July, I got a temporary job at Ross! I could get clothes and random household items for even CHEAPER! My job duties were split between being a cashier, helping in the fitting rooms, and straightening merchandise in the store. I was happy for the small paycheck, but obviously I was trusting God for more. 

August

Four weeks into working at Ross, I was perusing the paralegal job openings, and saw an opening for a legal assistant at an estate planning law firm on Craigslist. Deducing the firm's website address from the contact person's email address where I should direct my resume, I researched the firm to see if I would be a good fit. In doing so, I realized that my friend from my estate planning class worked there. We emailed back and forth with her personal email she had given me to exchange notes in class, and she encouraged me to apply. 

That is how I found myself taking an elevator up to the 16th floor of an office building in Glendale, Colorado to have an interview. The attorneys were very warm yet professional, and my friend was also present at the interview. A few days later, I was called back to take a typing and computer-based assessment at the office. As I was taking the bus back from that appointment to my job at Ross, I received a call from the firm. They offered me the job, and I accepted. 

That began the four-day whirlwind of telling my managers at Ross that I had accepted another position. As a seasonal employee, they knew my employment status could change at any time, and they wished me luck. While eating out with my grandma and my mother, I showed them the email string where I had accepted the law firm's job offer. Of course, after I told my Boaz, he congratulated me with a warm hug and warm kisses :D 

September - November 

September was a bittersweet month for my Boaz and I. Little guy headed back to Pennsyvania, and I found myself fighting back tears as I gave him a hug and wished him well for the fall. God had answered my prayer of growing my heart for him. Boaz and I both missed his sweet little eight year-old, but we knew that we would have more time together. He celebrated by taking me to Elitches :) 

Yes, he is an EPIC boyfriend :) I bought him the shirt heeee heeeeeee!

October was a blur because I was getting used to my new job, and saving up for moving out.  I quite enjoyed reminding my mom that I had about six months at home before I flew the coup. The fall also brought my last paralegal class EVER! Legal Research was my evening class that I took in addition to having my new job. The fall was a blur because I was balancing school and work. That balance gave me an appreciation for my classmates who completed their entire paralegal program while working full time. It also gave me an appreciation for my Boaz who is also going to school, working full time, squeezing in time to romance his girlfriend, and invest in the development of his son. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! 

December 

I FLEW THE COUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Yup, I moved into an apartment right across the street from where I work! My commute shrank from an hour and a half bus ride to a 3 minute walk. 

I had an air mattress, some storage bins, some kitchen stuff, and enough for a deposit and a few month's rent, but I was freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!! 

Actually, it was a whirlwind for both my mom and I. I had been looking at places in the area and I had applied to this particular complex after seeing their model unit. My application was accepted sooner than I had expected, and suddenly Mom and I were looking at my unit where I would move if I signed the lease, and my Boaz drove around the complex one evening when he was on that side of town to make sure the lighting was adequate in the evening. 

My mom worried. A lot. I didn't have a full set of furniture to move in, but I was content to sit on my little stool in my small kitchen island to eat, cook in my wok and use my little plates and bowls until I could get more stuff. I just wanted to be free. Oh, and closer to work. 

Enter my Boaz! He brought light to my move. Literally. 

He took me to Target to get an air mattress and I got this lamp that he assembled. He also hung my shower curtain since he is tall and I am decidedly not. More importantly, he reassured my mom that I would be fine, God was providing a job, and I had made the decision to sign the lease after making a budget like we had learned in the Dave Ramsey class we took in..... sometime earlier. 

He encouraged me that I couldn't let Mom's worries dictate my major decisions, and he would support me as I made my way knowing I was a competent adult. Many tears were shed as he held me in his arms as I prepared to move out. 

Christmas was soon approaching and on December 23, he brought little guy over to see my new place. He also brought me my Christmas present since both of us would be with our respective families. 

If you read the previous posts, you already know what my early present was, but just for giggles.....

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Heee heee! See the post on that :D 

Oh yes, and I also passed my last paralegal class ever, meaning my diploma should be coming soon to.... my new address!!!!! :D 

Yeah. 

2013 was epic! Not because I did anything special, but because GOD IS AWESOME! And the cool thing is, even if none of the awesome life events had taken place in my life this last year..... GOD WOULD STILL MANIFEST HIS AWESOMENESS! :D 

Spiritual Family of Origin

Cuuuuute little cup!!!!!

I found this cuuuuuuuuuute little cup today when I was going through even more of my apartment stuff. No idea why it wasn't in my kitchen stuff, but oh well... It was the only little cup in the set left because the other little cups were in an unfortunate collision with the sidewalk.... Twas a sad day for little me and little them :(

Anyway, I squeaked when I saw that cup because I thought of a good Fort Collins friend who volunteered at AWANA with me :) She gave me the little cups and she was like a big sister because she was married and we had many conversations about me waiting for The One God had for me :) She was one of my many "Proverbs 31 Mentors." Meaning, she was part of a group of ladies I looked up to and who I wanted to emulate if God ever called a guy to pursue me and to put a RING ON IT!!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAK! 

Thinking about her also got me thinking about Women's Coffeehouse at Summitview. When we did the series Biblical Femininity, I sorta thought of it as Proverbs 31 or Wife Training School. The premise of that series was to obey Titus 2 which instructs older women to teach younger women. Married and single women came to the teachings, and women who had been married a long time spoke. 

As I begin preparing for the wedding ceremony and preparing for life being married to my Boaz - SQUEAK!!!! I find myself thinking about my spiritual family of origin. My peeps at Summitview Community Church in Fort Collins. 

There's an HDFS concept that we have two families: Family of Origin which consists of your parents, siblings, and people who raised you, and Family of Procreation which consists of your spouse/partner and children raised within that relationship. The family of origin of both adults influences their marriage/relationship and how they raise their children. 

I was spiritually raised in Summitview and I will probably begin my married life at Southeast Christian Church in Parker :) The way I connect to my new church home and the way I connect with my sweet Boaz will be influenced partly by how I was raised at Summitview. 

This isn't necessarily an all good or all bad thing. Like all local churches, Summitview had its own unique strengths and weaknesses. An obvious strength of Summitview is the Gospel as the core of one's being and one's identity, and the laser-beam focus on reaching the world for Jesus. The literal interpretation of Genesis combined with an epic biology nerd as a pastor made for some really nerdy and awesome seminars and teachings :) Recently, some friends of mine pointed out a weakness: The Rock (college group) had a very strict stance of: Guys, don't pursue a lady if you're not 100% sure you're going to marry her, and ladies, don't let your heart fall for a guy because what if he's not The One? Gender-relations wise, this made life... interesting. For an Aspie college student, it helped me establish rules on how to act around those students that were sometimes grungy, a little strange, and had a Y chromosome. 

Couples who also began their Christian life at Summitview and continued attending the church after marriage often had very set gender roles: Dude goes to work, Bride pops kids, raises them, and homeschools them. Again, I saw really awesome examples of these families, and what I saw beyond their completely countercultural way of doing gender roles was how they sought to permeate their family life with Christ and their desire to teach their children about their Savior. That warmed my heart, and I treasured my time there as a Sunday school helper and teacher seeing kids grow developmentally and grow in learning about the God that made them and saved them.... .aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! :) Oh, and the cuteness overload working with preschoolers was awesome too! 

So... all that will play a role in what I expect out of marriage and how I relate to Boaz as my fiance. Knowing that not every church does stuff like Summitview makes me willing to allow Boaz to lead us in the way he sees God leading us :)

The emphasis on the male as the spiritual leader of the household has helped me encourage my Boaz in praying for us and he has told me how that has empowered him and challenged him in his walk with God :) My response was : "Good, that was my evil plan :D" But seriously, that's cool! Yet I know that I can't fall into leaning solely on my Boaz's leadership for my spiritual development. I need to have my own relationship with God. 

Also, I also have to remember that my life might not look like those ladies that spoke at 'Wife School.' My Boaz is still in school, so I might not be able to stop working. Plus, I like my job and it's going well, so I would like to stay with my law firm for a while. Knowing that my Boaz comes from a church that has more of an emphasis on, "Read your Bible and then ask God what He wants you to do" rather than, "Read your Bible, listen to this teaching, and ask your pastor or spiritual mentor what to do." I have to remind myself that it's ok not to have a life that looks like other people who are further along in the faith as long as Christ is at the center. 

My spiritual family of origin has really helped me shape how I interact with little guy. I pray for his salvation, and I have told Boaz that I want to know how I can support him to lead his son to Christ. I will probably volunteer in Sunday School again - maybe in the same room as my Boaz, and I look forward to the day where both of us can be in the same classroom as little guy or our future children :) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! 

Thinking about my spiritual family of origin has made me appreciate the gems of wisdom God brought me while part of that church. I look forward to growing in the faith with a Gospel-centered identity, a desire to reach the world for Christ, and a desire to support my Boaz as we grow together in our faith and in our relationship :) I also know that my spiritual family of origin won't completely define my path in this new phase of life. God, who is above all our childhood families of origin, is above our spiritual families of origin as well. He will guide both my sweet Boaz and I, and He will be our ultimate guide :)

RING!

SQUEAK!!!!!!!!! ......EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

My sweet Boaz proposed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Yeah, I couldn't wait to put it in Part 2 of Year in Review, so I just went with it! 

Our engagement date is 12/23/13! 

Place: My livingroom 

Sweet Boaz texted me asking if he could come over and show little guy my new place. I, of course, said yes :) He came over and I gave the guys a 2 minute grand tour. My Boaz gave me my Christmas card since he and little guy would be with his family for Christmas and I would be with mine. The card was soooooooooo sweet and so pretty and SPARKLY and sweet! It was a prayer of thankfulness of how God brought us together :) and he had written: I love you. Are you ready? 

"Am I ready?" I asked confused. Turning around, my sweet Boaz was on one knee with a shiny sparkly metal ..... RING IN HIS MASSIVE HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I managed to hold my squeaks back so he could tell me how much he loved me and how grateful he was for God to bring him into my life and such and he asked if I would marry him. 

Then..... 

Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak! Giggles! squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak! EEEK! Giggles! Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak! 

He slid the ring on my finger and more giggling ensued. 

Then..... WE KISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Then, Boaz said, "Well, you know, you never actually answered my question." 

"Huh?" I asked grinning and staring at the new sparkly on my finger. 

"Will you marry me?" 

"Yes! Of course, dork!" Smooooooooooooooooooch! 

At this point, little guy was like, "Gross!" Like any 9 year old boy, he had hit gushiness overload and ran into my room and hid. His giggles gave him away as I checked under the bed and then the closet. 

My comeback: "Dude, you know you hid from kissing in a closet full of girl clothes!" We all hung out at my place and the dudes played with my exercise ball by bouncing it around or spinning it on their fingers (Boaz) or sitting and bouncing on it (little guy). They played with my beanbag chair by wearing it on their heads. Dorks. But they are my dorks and I love them! 

Yup! And that is how I got engaged!!! :D 

Close up of riiiiiiiiiiiiiing! 

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! Us earlier in the year :) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! 

2013 Year in Review Jan - May

Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwg!!!!!!!!!!! I missed you!!!!!!!!!!!!! We're still friends!!!!!!!!! I promise!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Ok, now that's out of the way :) 

We begin: Katie's Year in Review! 

January was a great month! One crisp Saturday morning, I boarded the southbound D line of Light Rail to meet a handsome dorky man who was my Boaz! :) After two months of talking with him online, we would meet in person :) at the Starbucks by Aspen Grove! 

 

During a walk on a nearby trail, he took my small hands in his warm massive hands and told me how much he liked me and he saw my heart for God and stuff and asked me to be his girlfriend! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW! 

A short time later, he used his warm massive fingers to wipe tears away from my eyes when I began crying confessing that I didn't know how Mom would react to me having a boyfriend who was - um - 14 years older - yet I believed God had a plan for our relationship. After a nice talk, a hug, and a kiss on the forehead, I felt confident that this was the man God was calling to pursue me :) 

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! 

That January also began: My WORST PARALEGAL CLASS EVER! :O My classmates and I struggled with the instructor's teaching style resulting in 90% of us failing our first several assignments. Worst of all, I couldn't tell my mom because she would FREAK OUT!!

Enter Boaz: I texted him (or maybe I called him when my mom wasn't home.... I can't remember) and cried about my class. One Tuesday afternoon, while waiting for an evening class to start, who should appear but my sweet Boaz? Poking his head in the doorway, he asked for me and I squeaked! Then I hurried into his arms where he gave me a hug and kiss in the hallway while encouraging me that he was praying for me and that class :) :) 

Well, I was all smiles for the rest of the evening :) 

February was my first Valentine's Day with a boyfriend! :) 

My sweet Boaz took me to the Olive Garden!! :) for Valentine's Day!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW! 

The beginning of February was also great! I got to meet the clan of my sweet Boaz!!!! :) :) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! His 4 nieces are SOOOOOOO CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTE and they love him to pieces! His parents are great too :) 

March

I bid adeu to the Worst Paralegal Class Ever (along with over 95% of the class). My stress level went down and my tuition was reimbursed! Yay! That 'free period' was replaced by more hours volunteering at Colorado Legal Services and I began looking for an internship. 

Outside of school, I met the cutest eight year old! :) Boaz, his son, and I spent the day before Easter at Cheyenne Mountain Zoo. Little guy was great and pointed out the animals in their environments as well as their droppings. He found the rhinoceros droppings rather impressive... Oh, eight year old kids! We all tried our hand at climbing a climbing wall and little guy got pretty far! My spry Boaz even tried and he climbed as high as his son! I tried and well... my feet didn't touch for a bit :) We rode the ski-lifts and got an arial view of the zoo and ended the day with dippin' dots! 

I'll ask Boaz if he would mind if pictures of his little guy appeared on my blog, but for now, here's a picture of Boaz and the massive giraffe! :) 

Sweet Boaz took a picture of me feeding the giraffes, and well, you can see the fence, the giraffe, and.... oh, I guess that really is little me! 

April

I began my Paralegal internship at Metro Volunteer Lawyers :) It's in the same office as Colorado Legal Services, and I worked in the Family Law Court Program where we did the court filings and kept track of pleadings that clients who were technically pro se completed. The paralegals and interns helped clients fill out the forms, but they didn't get full representation. However, we were able to help a lot of people with simple divorce or custody cases navigate the court system. 

The Boston Bombing happened on April 15 and Boaz and I prayed for the victims involved. We prayed that people would seek God and see His goodness even in the midst of that event. 

My Boaz took me to PF Changs for my birthday :) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw!!!!!! 

and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! 

May

May featured THE MOST EPIC CHRIS TOMLIN CONCERT AT RED ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yup! My Boaz treated me to the concert!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAK! 

I have a blog post devoted to it too :) 

May was also when my best friend EVER graduated with her degree in Marketing!!!!! :) Boaz and I went to her party and celebrated her well deserved accomplishment!!!! :) :)